Spilling the Tea on Hypnosis for Love

When many people think of hypnosis, the first thing that likely comes to mind is a scary movie scene involving mind control.

#NonSpoilerAlert: Like in the film Get Out, where the mom her sent victims unwillingly into the Sunken Place by stirring a cup of tea with a teaspoon. But that’s just a movie and is not how hypnosis really works.

Movies always make things much more dramatically interesting than they usually are. If someone else COULD take control of your mind without your consent, the entire world would all be living happily in the Sunken Place right now.

Instead of a movie, you may have thought of a stage performance where the hypnotist has a volunteer from the audience clucking like a chicken and eating popcorn kernels off the floor.

I don’t hate to break it to you, but that volunteer likely already wanted the attention and was gonna do exactly as asked without being in a hypnotic state. 1 in 10 people thrive off of that level of attention btw, so as long as 10 people are in the audience, the odds are in your favor for a good show.

Real hypnosis is just as interesting but it doesn’t involve being mentally controlled by someone else.

#SpoilerAlert: you can’t use hypnosis to make an unwilling person fall in love with you.

In fact, hypnosis is just a normal state of mind that we all go into and out of nearly every day of our lives. And anyone who is willing and able to follow instructions can be hypnotized — so if you don’t want to be hypnotized you won’t be.

But the challenge is that most people don’t know how to intentionally access the state of hypnosis without assistance.

As a hypnotherapist, I’m really just a coach who guides you into the hypnotic state. I’m not in control of you, your subconscious mind is.

All hypnosis is actually self-hypnosis because you are in control the whole time. The hypnotist just gives you instructions to take yourself into the state, which you can come out of at any moment.

(Fun fact: the hypnotist also has to be in a state of hypnosis to effectively guide you there. So hypnotizing someone is really just teaching them to take themselves into state).

You've actually been in a hypnotic state thousands and thousands of times. Here are some examples you may have experienced:

  • If you’re an athlete, performer, or any type of skilled worker you may be familiar with the feeling of being “in the zone” or in a state of “flow.” That’s hypnosis.

  • If you’ve ever traveled a familiar route in your car and recognized you were “on autopilot” for a portion of the drive. That’s hypnosis.

  • If you’ve ever lost track of time while in the shower, reading a good book, or doing anything else you enjoy (like cooking or drawing). Yep, that’s hypnosis too. AND,

  • If you’ve ever felt strong emotion about ANYTHING, whether positive or negative, you were also in a hypnotic state.

What is Hypnosis Really?

Hypnosis is simply a state of focused awareness and receptivity where our subconscious mind—which controls 95% of our lives—is in the driver seat. 

The subconscious mind is the “real you” and is where all of your beliefs, emotions, memories, and habits live. And when something is a habit, you don’t have to “think” about it because it’s automatic.

So in essence, hypnosis IS indeed mind control, but it’s specifically when YOUR subconscious mind is in control.

Hypnosis is NOT relaxation (Serena is definitely not relaxed when she’s winning a tennis match) but it can be used to help you relax.

Hypnosis is also NOT sleep. The person who “discovered” hypnosis initially thought it was a form of sleep and news of the misnamed concept spread like a coronavirus (oh, too soon?). But he later found out the truth and tried to rename it “monoideism” (which means “one idea” AKA “concentration”).

Clearly, that didn’t catch on.

When in hypnosis, the overly analytical monkey mind settles down, which facilitates easy concentration, increased productivity, relaxation and loads of other things. 

Due to the fact that our habits (our automatic patterns of action which live in the subconscious) create and sustain the results in our lives, everything you currently have in your life, whether you like it or not, is a result of your subconscious programming.

If you have something you don’t want, it’s because you are continually (and often unconsciously) perpetuating a program that doesn’t lead to what you do want. Which also means that anything you want but don’t currently have is a result of your subconscious programming as well. 

This is what we refer to as self-sabotage: when your conscious mind wants one thing but your subconscious is programmed to automatically deliver something else. 

Since the subconscious controls 95% of your life, this means that it will overpower any conscious decisions that contradict the program, but only 95% of the time. This is why willpower and discipline (which live in the CONSCIOUS mind) don’t usually work for most of us except for about 5% of the time.

In order to get your results to match your desires, you have to make sure that you’ve changed the subconscious programming, or else the change either won’t happen at all or won’t happen consistently.

Using Hypnosis for Love

Since all of your beliefs, emotions, and habits are controlled by the subconscious, being in a hypnotic state allows you to directly and often immediately reprogram habitual patterns of self-sabotage and replace beliefs and behaviors that no longer serve you in any area of life - including dating and relationships.

Hypnotherapy is when we use the state of hypnosis to do just that. 

My specialty is hypnosis for love, which is a component of what I call “Love Alchemy” because we transform your love blocks into relationship gold by:

  • Reducing your dating anxiety and self-doubt,

  • Increasing your self-confidence and self-esteem,

  • Healing trust issues, childhood wounds, and baggage from previous relationships,

  • Enhancing your receptivity to love and magnifying your magnetism,

  • Neutralizing nearly any form of romantic self-sabotage or other love blocks you may be experiencing, and

  • Reinforcing new positive feelings, beliefs, behaviors, and skills you may wish to turn into habits. 

The thing that makes Love Alchemy really awesome is that it addresses the two biggest obstacles to finding love: subconscious patterns of self-sabotage and ineffective dating skills. 

We not only reprogram the subconscious through hypnosis, but we also level up your dating skills simultaneously through dating coaching, and by doing both we make lasting love inevitable. 

Through Love Alchemy you transform from jaded, frustrated, and single into a competent, confident, love magnet.

If you’d like to sample the experience of hypnosis for yourself, I’ve created a 27-minute guided hypnotic mediation called Align with Love that you can download below.

Free Guided Hypnosis
Recording

Download the Align with Love guided hypnotic meditation to renew your romantic energy and enhance your receptivity to love.

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    Amari Ice is a gay love coach, matchmaker, and hypnotherapist who helps successful singles master their romantic magic by developing their dating skills, healing subconscious patterns of self-sabotage, and enhancing their romantic magnetism so that love becomes inevitable. Take the free Dating Skills Quiz to discover your dating skill level.